Saturday 2 June 2012

So-o-o-o-o-o-o close (May 23 column)

So close and yet so far away  


                                                            by Robert LaFrance



            I have visited the State of Maine three times in the past month, after not crossing the border for at least two years, and found it unchanged. They still have churches, but more people go to their ‘redemption centres’ which I would have guessed were  the same things, but aren’t.

            (Looking back at that first paragraph, I’m thinking I need some lessons in English word construction and grammar, but perhaps you know what I mean anyway.)

            It seems that, over there, a redemption centre is a place to take back empty beer and ‘soda’ bottles; over here we would call them returnables, and we certainly wouldn’t return soda bottles, because over here soda comes in a small cardboard box.

            It’s quite amazing how two locales so close to one another can be so strikingly different in thinking. Over there, across the border, I see helmet-less motorcyclists zooming around and helmet-clad kids on bicycles riding around. On this side of the border, it’s the other way around. About five years ago the police made a determined effort – at least in this area – to persuade kids to wear helmets, but I guess they’ve found other interests - perhaps the heinous crime of smuggling cigarettes from Nova Scotia.

            Over in the U.S.A. the worst insult one person can sneer at another is to call him a Communist. Over here, it’s accusing him of voting for Brian Mulroney back in the 1980s. Nobody forgets that particular rub of the Blarney Stone.

            The Americans (with mostly Canadian players) have taken over NHL hockey, but Canada is gaining ground (so to speak) in Major League Soccer. Who knew? Rocket Richard is spinning like a top.

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            Every once in a while, just to pass the time, I turn on the TV and watch some news, or porn, or something, and the other evening when I was half-dozing and watching the CTV news from Ottawa I was quite surprised to learn that terrorist Omar Khadr might be released by the Americans from Guantanamo Bay prison and brought to a Canadian prison to finish his term. Although a Canadian citizen and only fifteen when he was arrested, he’s there because in 2002 he killed an American doctor in Afghanistan.

            Three years ago the Federal Court of Canada ruled that the Charter of Rights and Freedoms made it obligatory for the government to immediately demand Khadr's return. In 2010 Khadr pleaded guilty to the murder but showed no signs of remorse.  He was sentenced to eight more years in custody but might be able to come to a Canadian prison any time all the paperwork gets arranged.

            I realize that the Canadian government has tried to avoid bringing him back to Canada, but it looks as if they will have to. I’m just wondering where The Federal Court of Canada was when Henk Tepper was being held in Lebanon although he hadn’t even been charged with a crime. One of the many mysteries of life.

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            The May 14 municipal elections and those for District Education Councils and Horizon Health board went like clockwork – if the clock’s hands were duct-taped to the face of the cloth. During the week preceding the election I heard many times that we should all know by 8:15 pm – a quarter hour after the polls closed – that so-and-so had been elected the mayor of such-and-such and ‘here is the list of elected councillors’, etc.

            Well…

            The truth that emerged on election night was that I, as a hard-working newspaper reporter, didn’t know until 10:30 pm what the results were in Perth-Andover, which was the one I was covering.

I sat here staring at my computer monitor and watching the Elections NB website for any sign of a result, even if the town of Canterbury’s full-time janitor had been re-elected to his broom. On that glacial website was a continuing notice that it was being ‘refreshed’ ever minute, which was fine, except that the same numbers sat there for an hour and a half. Finally, at 10:30 pm, both I and the website had been ‘refreshed’ so much we almost fell off our chairs (that was humour) it emerged

            Congratulations to the village’s new mayor, Terry Ritchie, and to the five councillors who were elected, but jeepers creepers, it took so long for us to find out that half their terms are up by now.

            Being an investigative journalist, I asked someone who should know why it took Elections NB so long to produce the results. I found that the people working in the polling stations had to HAND-DELIVER the tapes of results to the local returning offices located, sometimes, twenty or more kilometres away.

            Remember the old days when people on the spot counted the votes and phoned them in to the returning office? It was faster. Welcome to high-tech 2012.
                                       -end-    

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