Is
it stupidity…or just plain lying?
by
Robert LaFrance
As I write these immortal words, the
wind is howling outside and the snow is up to our upstairs windows. School is
cancelled everywhere and the ditches are decorated with Mazdas and Fords – not
Rob Ford, but useful Fords.
Why do we put up with this kind of
behaviour from the weathermen and shapely weatherwomen? (I’ve been watching the
Weather Channel.) Why do we not all move to Costa Rica where everyone is rich
and the sun shines all the time except at night when there is a little shower to make the
gardens grow?
I have a cold and I have cabin
fever, even though our estate is considerably larger than a cabin. The last
time I saw a snowplough was yesterday and I have a sneaking feeling that those
government cutbacks in the snowploughing budget are now taking effect, although
I have never seen a government cutback yet that resulted in a reduction of
service. I’m sure you recognize sarcasm.
Don’t you love those announcements
from our beloved politicians? “Yes, we are closing 29 government facilities and
laying off 582 workers, but this will not result in a reduction of service.” Of
course there are only two choices if one were to describe the person making the
announcement: stupid or lying, but I suppose, in a pinch, he or she could be
both.
I recall back in the early 1990s,
when the federal government, under the stage name ‘Canada Post’, was closing
post offices all over Canada – in Aroostook for example – and in each case
insisting there wouldn’t be any reduction in service. Hmmmm…let’s say I lived
in Aroostook and could walk to the post office to mail a parcel. Next day I
have to drive to Perth. Reduction in service? Not at all, duh, you can still
mail your parcel, can’t you?
What brought on this rant was my
daily newspaper’s headline on January 23: “Horizon Cuts Radiology Jobs”. Our
old friend Horizon Health was eliminating 12 positions, only eight of which had
actually been filled at the time. This, according to the HH bureaucrat who
announced these job cuts in the X-ray departments, was going to save $500,000
annually, and was “not going to have a detrimental effect on wait times” and in
fact would “streamline” things. Do they never get tired of uttering this
drivel?
Stupid or lying. Take your pick.
*****************************
Another newspaper report I was
particularly struck by was one that didn’t involve government spokesmen, and I
was pleased for the break. A story that came from the Canadian Press was
reporting on a survey or poll that asked people how much money they need to
have saved before they can retire comfortably.
People in my tax bracket said they
would be happy to have a dollar seventy-five and VISA payments of less than
$100 a month, plus a low rent payment, plus the ownership of a car less than
ten years old. While they said retiring to Florida was out of the question,
perhaps south central Mexico (away from the tourist areas) might be possible if
they laid off the tequila and kept the scorpion bites to a minimum.
As the poll went up the ladder,
people now making more than $30,000 a year thought they needed liquid assets of
$200,000 to retire – if they had a pension – and that would be to the warm
climes of Maine.
What astounded me was that ‘average
Canadians’ – and none of us will admit to being average – thought they needed
$908,000 in investments to be able to retire. If they owned (free and clear as
they say) a house in Vancouver, for example, they could retire as soon as they
sold it. A bungalow on Davie Street would sell for $907,999 and the owner could
find that other dollar on the sidewalk.
Now we come to the ‘affluent’
Canadians. These are people whose annual income was in the $400,000-plus range.
These folks felt that they needed assets and investments totalling $2.3 MILLION
plus pensions in order to retire comfortably.
I think I would have to look
carefully at the word ‘comfortably’. Would they eat Vector cereal for breakfast
at $7.50 a box, or Rice Krispies at $4.00? Would they have to drive a Lexus
instead of a Taurus? Would they have to live in a penthouse over the Legion and
drink only the finest wines? Why would anyone possibly need that much money
just to retire and take a pension?
Just before I started writing this
column, I gave ‘cabin fever’ a good kick by going uptown to buy a lottery ticket. The top prize is $2.5 million and
I intend to win, this time. Never mind that, since the mid-1970s when I started
buying lottery tickets, I have won the grand total of $156; I plan to win this
lottery. The question is, what will I do with that extra $200,000?
-end-
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